THANK GOD, I Don't Look Like What I've Been Through : Crystal Varner : 9780692624128 : 0692624120 : 18 Jan 2016 : From as early as my childhood I have had to deal with betrayal, trust issues, feeling unloved and unwanted. Not quite knowing where the feeling of emptiness was coming from, since I lived in a home full of love. I made a lot of mistakes growing up, but I learned that the things that I clung to for love; i.e.: money and men to name a few, were just fillers from what I was truly missing. God called me, rescued me, cleaned me up and changed my name. Death came to kill me- but didn't succeed. Deceit came to ruin me - but had to flee. Lies came to break me - but only strengthened me. And I can only thank God that I don't look like what I've been through.