Attach Me If You Can : 9781554527373 : 07 Oct 2011 : Paul Tournier stated: "At the heart of personality is the need to feel a sense of being lovable without having to qualify for that acceptance." In 1975 when I started seeing children in therapy at the Grand Rapids Child Guidance Clinic in Grand Rapids, Michigan it seemed like the major problems with children consisted of acute traumas caused by sudden tragedies like house fires, car accidents and abuse issues. Then there were the lesser problems of separation anxieties, night terrors, bed wetting and oppositional defiance. By the time I transitioned from the clinic to Head Start in 1998, most of the problems seemed much more serious. I found children who displayed little to no conscience, kids who could not make friends and many who exhibited violent rage reactions. What happened in less than a quarter century? It became more and more clear to me that parents and children were losing the capacity to attach to each other. I went o